Randomness Guide to London Menu

Best Turkish Kebab has been run by the same family for over 30 years, and remains extremely popular with locals, partygoers willing to walk up the road from Dalston and police officers from the nearby station. There are always at least 2 elephant legs on the go.

The shop is takeaway only and as such has no seating. The large but fast-moving queues in the evening often seem completely haphazard, but the staff keep track of exactly who has ordered what (and when) on a simple but effective back-of-an-envelope system. The walls are covered in press plaudits to read while you wait, including large, eyecatching pictures of Ainsley Harriot and Ross from Friends.

Kat has visited on several occasions (including when sober) and tends to order a small lamb shish wrap (£4, large £5). As these are cooked to order they take around 10 minutes, but they're worth the wait — smokier than a Glastonbury campfire and a melt-in-the-mouth texture. Salad and chilli sauce is optional but recommended, and you can swap the wrap for a pitta if you like. The chips and meat (£5) is also a decent amount of food and will arrive much more quickly as it comes from the doner leg, but the chips are nothing special. Be prepared for your whole house to stink of lovely fragrant onions when you get home.